An imperative aspect of self love is being okay with being by yourself. I’m not strictly talking about while in a romantic relationship, but in general as well. You have to know who you are to avoid floundering around and being lost in the crowd; to find who you are as an individual. Who are you? As an individual, deep down, away from your family, your friends, maybe even your significant other, WHO ARE YOU?
In some of my observations of the people around me, I’ve noticed a good amount of them were scared to be alone. Because of that aversion, it was so easy for them to cling to anyone who will give them attention, or keep them company. I imagine, in the past, they’ve continuously found themselves in this constant cycle of unsuccessful relationships because they’re trying to avoid being alone. You can cause yourself a world of hurt when you don’t take the time to get to know yourself.
How can you really and truly develop as a person if you’re unsure of who you are?
Are you allowing yourself to constantly be influenced by those around you just because you don’t want to feel alone? Are you afraid of speaking up about things that interest you? What is holding you back from reaching that potential of being the best version of yourself?
One thing I’ve applied to my own life to help elevate myself mentally and emotionally and to continue to cultivate my self-love is taking the activities that I do with others and doing them on my own as well, whether it’s going out to eat, catching a movie or just spending time in meditation and self-reflection. For a long time, I was also someone who couldn’t stand to be alone. I had become so much of a follower that when I hit rock bottom, I had no idea who I was because I just went along with what others wanted. I was no longer comfortable to do things I really enjoyed.
When I decided to start my journey of self-discovery, my eyes opened to a world of different possibilities. Through the process of enjoying doing different activities by myself, I’ve grown to be more comfortable and confident in my body and who I am.
I’ve learned that it’s okay to be by yourself and that I shouldn’t depend on anyone for my happiness. If there’s one thing every person should know, it’s this: learn who you are as an individual. It makes being in a relationship a lot easier and more successful when you are confident in who you are as an individual. The road is long and walking it won’t be easy, but the results are so worth it.
My name is Janessa-Michelle, and I love watching football, eating food, and being around and spending time with my family. By learning myself, I’ve learned that I enjoy spending time solo, reading, and taking the time I have in the still quietness to think without the disturbance of others.
Take the time to discover who you are and flourish in that self love?